Goes to show you don’t ever know
Watch each card you play
and play it slow
Wait until your deal come round
--RH, 1972
My most recent job hunt was one of the most fast and furious in recent years. My phone had been ringing off the hook for over a year and so once I became available, and I was at home instead of at work, the headhunters got me instead of my answering machine. I had so much interviewing activity that I had two job offers inside of a month—a new land speed record! I was about to accept the one from a startup company when I received an offer I could not refuse to consult for a company whose name most readers would recognize. I took the job with the well-known alternative at the eleventh hour. This turned out to be unfortunate as they flaked out on me and I was up a job search without a paddle. Fortunately, within another month, I had more offers.
This was just the tip of the iceberg regarding poor behavior. A number of headhunters and other pursuers were unresponsive, undependable, late, and otherwise flaky. Some of these people have behaved this way with me a number of times over the years, and therefore have never matched me with a job. Fortunately, on the employment front, there are enough responsible and talented people that the flakes don’t impede my progress too much and it is fine that those who snoozed losed [sic]. If only this were true on other fronts as many of us in the Bay Area routinely experience these behaviors with people.
Picture a bright blue ball just spinning, spinning free
Dizzy with eternity
Paint it with a skin of sky, brush in some clouds and sea
Call it home for you and me
A peaceful place, or so it looks from space
A closer look reveals the human race
Full of hope, full of grace, is the human face
But afraid we may lay our home to waste
--JPB, 1987
During my employment respite, AuntieBellum came out to visit and investigate how engineers find jobs in Silicon Valley. We had a great time visiting and looking for dangerous things at the beach. I also took her to the Visitor’s Center at NASA and showed her exhibits of the Space Station’s Centrifuge Facility Project, for which I was the human factors engineer, and the AX-5 spacesuit, for which I was a safety diver in the Neutral Buoyancy Test Facility. The spacecraft flight simulator and virtual reality lab were too big to display in the museum. Ah, the good old days.
After Auntie left, I focused on the end game of my job search. I accepted a job and began working the next day breaking both the company’s records for time between offer and acceptance, and time between acceptance and start. The company, my fourteenth job in the thirteen years since I left NASA, broke records in my book too as they had both a computer and name plate for me by the time I arrived less than 24 hours later. Coincidentally, one of my first activities at my new job was the same as one of my last activities at NASA: a Halloween party.
As usual, I hit the ground running. By the end of the first week, I discovered where leftover food lands after meetings, and I scored a cool mug and water bottle. By the end of the second week, I scored a T-shirt, a nice pen, a mug, and a portfolio. By the end of the third week, people were praising my work and I rode my bike to work. Then I took a break for Thanksgiving. After six weeks, the stock was up over 20%. As usual, the stock market and I are marching to the same drummer. (On a related note, the brain drain followed me out of all recent work places. Of particular note is the one out of an internet company, whose name all readers would recognize. Not only did virtually every other remaining senior person follow me out the door, but the stock is down close to 30% since I left twelve months ago.)
I began to complete the form for business cards and my boss told me that he felt it was important for me to have “Engineer” in my title as it would carry caché. I wanted to be sure to include “User Experience” and “Design”, as those terms were important to me. I thought Senior User Experience Design Engineer would accommodate both of our requirements and cleverly translate to SUEDE. My boss protested because Principal is higher than Senior and said I deserved the higher rank. So I’m PUEDE instead. I’m sure PETA is relieved.
Faring thee well now
Let your life proceed by its own designs
Nothing to tell now
Let the words be yours, I’m done with mine
--JPB, 1972
I was eager to return to work after my break, but it meant leaving my home routine behind. Since they have oatmeal at work, I am having breakfast there rather than at home so I had not seen the Club Adam Breakfast Lady for a few weeks. I bumped into her over one weekend and she said she missed me and kept wondering, “where’s that caliente guy!” It’s nice to be missed. My friends at Fidelity are similarly disappointed I’m no longer entertaining them, but they’re glad I’m replacing the deposits of my unemployment checks with deposits of my employment checks.
Well we got there and there was a big sign and a chain across across the dump saying, “Closed on Thanksgiving.” And we had never heard of a dump closed on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our eyes we drove off into the sunset looking for another place to put the garbage.
We didn’t find one. Until we came to a side road, and off the side of the side road there was another fifteen foot cliff and at the bottom of the cliff there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile is better than two little piles, and rather than bring that one up we decided to throw our’s [sic] down.
--AG, 1966
Before leaving for Thanksgiving, I called a meeting with my boss. I had not seen much of him since I began working and I was anxious about providing some promised deliverables by the end of the year. He reassured me by saying that all he wanted from me was to build relationships with others in the company and that I had already not only done that but I had received praise from some of them. He convinced me that I should enjoy myself and not work during my vacation. I’m amazed that once again, in just a short amount of time, I’ve accomplished what was expected to take several times longer. I don’t think I’m too humble to wonder how this can possibly be the case, but it’s harder to believe that my standards are so much higher than everyone else’s.
Walk in the sunshine, watch for the bright sun,
Be all those things you’re able to be.
--JPB, 1972
Hours after arriving in Florida on a redeye, I took Mom and Dad to a Bob Weir and Ratdog concert. Since neither Dad nor The Grateful Dead have worked in Albany in years, I figured it was time for a reunion. Just in case my folks weren’t prepared, I brought extra accoutrements: ear plugs and tie dyes. The organizers told us that the concert was going to start an hour early, so we arrived early accordingly. However, they didn’t actually start until shortly after the originally scheduled start time. Once again, I’m burned by following directions, but I don’t know how to behave otherwise. Mom was cold and tired by this point, but still managed to tough it out for a few songs. Notably, each of the first few songs my folks heard could have been heard from my room as a child. I guess my folks were less impressed with the coincidence and nostalgia than I was and so they bid me good night.
As they were leaving, I thought I heard Mom mumble something about it smelling like the art teacher’s office. I didn’t smell anything like finger paint or wax, but I’ve often remarked that Mom smells better than the rest of us, so I gave her the benefit of the doubt. Also, I know that as a teacher for many years, Mom was well aware of how art teachers prepare for class and so she must be onto something. After they left, I went up to the stage, where I heard a great show and met some people affiliated with the band.
Some folks trust to reason, others trust to might
...
Some folks look for answers, others look for fights
--JPB, 1972
For other fun in Florida, I enjoyed swimming as I was looking forward to trying out my new mask and fins. One day, I almost swam into a manatee. We acknowledged each other and then went our separate ways.
Also, when Dad heard that both of my tennis teams made the Playoffs, he insisted that we go to the courts a few times so that I would stay in shape. For cross training, Dad took me for walks on the beach. This reminded me of how he would take me to NYC during school vacations to get me out of Mom’s hair.
Lastly, I was impressed at the pace of things in Florida. Some drive fast; others drive slowly. Most walk slowly and they like to have dinner at 5:30 to save time for other things they like to do quickly.
I can go anyway (way I choose)
I can live anyhow (win or lose)
I can go anywhere (for something new)
Anyway, anyhow, anywhere I choose
--PT & RD, 1965
Only a few days after returning home from Florida, I went to Toronto on business to visit our office there. Right after I arrived, I learned that The Who were playing that night and it occurred to me that the last time I went to Toronto was to see The Who. I missed seeing them in San Jose, Florida, and now Toronto this tour. I guess we’ll have to wait until next time.
Later that evening, I found an urgent email to call my boss. Since it was too late to call, I merely went to bed anxious, wondering if I would have a job the following day. Just in case, I began thinking about things I could do in Toronto until my flight home a few days later. The next day I learned that there was a reorganization back home, and I was the only one in the group who survived. For once, I have Survivor Syndrome. Of course, nothing is forever. If it were, I wouldn’t have to write another chapter! Until then...
спасибо (spasibo) for playing.
©Adam Brody All rights reserved.
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